I woke up this morning to an email inbox filled with spam, probably from a single website I visited, and blindly plugged my information into. It’s such a waste of time having to sort through all that nonsense to search for legitimate email. I purposely keep a junk email account open for this sort of spam, but once in a while I find my personal accounts flooded with crap about the newest weight loss pills and how I can get cheaper auto insurance.
It reminds me of how I used to maneuver through life. Even before I really started drinking, I believed that life delivered me a handful of cards and I was doomed to live out a fated destiny. Provided to me were expectations, conformities, beliefs, fears, doubts, judgments, opinions, and ridicule. I was offered opportunities, distractions, religion, free-will and too many choices. We all come into this life open and carefree, yet we are passed into the arms of people who condition us the way they believe best suits our needs. It’s all so weird, and very restricting. People go crazy because they find themselves trapped as a result of limitation. The way we are brought up these days, is not natural. Mental illness is a result of spiritual distress, and it is unconsciously passed down from one generation to the next.
I literally had to institutionalize myself in a substance abuse program, in order to drudge myself out of spiritual conformity, and paddle my way back to freedom. I went in there plagued with so many people’s voices carrying on about whom I was supposed to be; unceasing in my hectic mind. After six months of following rules, going to groups and getting my ego mercilessly skinned, I left with only one voice. It was my very own. I didn’t even realize I had a voice of my own.
There is one voice within each of us. It’s extremely clear, if you become quiet enough to listen to it. It’s not the voice that chatters insistently in your mind. The true voice comes from a deeper part of you, and it’s the one that never leads you wrong. The voice in your head is a parrot really; delivering nonstop gibberish of every conformity, fear, doubt, belief, trauma, expectation, or judgment you’ve been acquainted with all your life. This is what we are accustomed to buying into. It’s the spam that never ceases, until you make it clear that you are no longer distracted and enticed by its deception.
You see, if you buy into the spam of your mind; you will never live a life of freedom.
Your heart’s voice, however, is the one that doesn’t become corroded over the years by careless conditioning. It has the same knowing and understanding from the time you are born, until the moment you die. It is kindled with direction, purpose, insight, maturity, knowledge, intuition, perspective and perception which go beyond the limitations of the human mind. It is flawless and boundless. There is no nonsense involved when your heart is guiding your way.
We get so caught up in the web of our minds; when it is so simple to drop down into our heart center and follow a clearer path, which we were meant to follow all along. I wrote this today because I get distracted and bombarded with the spam in my mind more often than I like to admit. I have ideals, concepts and beliefs that I buy into, but it only takes a few seconds for me to place all that aside and become present. Once I am present, I don’t have to look back and beat myself up over that time I was distracted. If I do that, I’m living right back in my mind. I like to think of my heart as a place of the constant smile. There is never judgment there, and always a way out of the mess I got myself into. We all have the ability to see our life clearly, but it takes consciousness to wake up and make our way back home to the heart.
Most mornings, I wake up badgered by the spam in my mind. It seems to take up a lot of space, and can be difficult to sort through. This morning I decided to forget the spam and find a place of silence. I wanted to start my day with a clean slate and the opportunity to make my way along in total clarity.
If you become lost in your life, simply take a few moments to clear your mind and center yourself in the boundless space of your heart. The heart is the identity of the spirit; the initial membrane which formed the human whole. You are never separate from your wholeness. It is only an illusion of the mind.
My desire for you today, is that you toss the spam and get to the sustenance of who you truly are! Get to the heart of the matter!